I recently asked a colleague of mine Amanda Kerr (Click here to learn more about Amanda) to write a blog for me on narcissistic trauma caused by Narcissism. Amanda is a hypnotherapist, Advanced blast technique practitioner, EFT Practitioner, Mind Coach & NLP Practitioner and has an established practice in London for over a decade. From time to time beyond the educational and coaching piece that I provide, some clients require further help to deal with the trauma. I have used Blast technique many times in the past with Amanda and often refer clients to her . Please have a read of this article. There are so many powerful modalities available for people who need help. I am always exploring and will happily make recommendations if I experience anything that will benefit my clients and that I have successfully tried myself . Amanda is very professional, empathetic, and very skilled in her work and I would highly recommend her.
Narcissistic Trauma
In today’s fast-paced and competitive professional world narcissistic trauma is much more prevalent. Workplaces are often touted as environments that foster collaboration, innovation, and growth.
However, for many employees, these spaces can also become breeding grounds for toxic behaviours at work, particularly when narcissistic individuals hold positions of power or influence. The trauma caused by workplace narcissism is a silent epidemic that deserves attention and understanding.
Narcissistic trauma inducing behaviour in the workplace can include exploiting colleagues for personal gain, undermining others’ achievements to elevate their own status, manipulating situations to maintain control or superiority and being overly critical of others.
For some people, these behaviours can be traumatic and the long-term effects can be deeply damaging and cause emotional trauma. Like other forms of psychological abuse and emotional abuse, it can lead to anxiety, depression and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
The Emotional and Psychological Impact of Narcissistic Trauma
Employees subjected to narcissistic trauma from narcissistic behaviours often experience a range of emotional and psychological challenges, including:
Chronic Stress and Anxiety: constantly walking on eggshells around a narcissistic boss or co-worker can lead to heightened stress levels. Employees may feel constantly on edge, fearing criticism or retaliation.
Low Self-Esteem : Narcissistic individuals often belittle or dismiss others’ contributions. Over time, this can erode an employee’s confidence in their abilities and self-worth.
Burnout : The relentless pressure to meet unreasonable demands or endure emotional manipulation can result in physical and emotional exhaustion.
Trauma Responses : Victims of workplace narcissism may develop symptoms similar to those of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), such as hypervigilance, difficulty concentrating, and emotional numbness.
How Childhood Trauma caused by narcissism can resurface in the workplace
For some people who grew up with a narcissistic parent or sibling, or experienced gaslighting by a teacher, the workplace can become an unexpected minefield. Encounters with narcissistic co-workers, managers, or even clients can retrigger unresolved wounds / traumas, making professional environments emotionally exhausting and mentally draining.
Narcissistic individuals thrive on manipulation and control. They often gaslight others, dismiss their contributions, and shift blame to maintain their sense of superiority. For someone with unresolved childhood trauma from a narcissistic family member or authority figure, these behaviours can feel all too familiar.
As children, we rely on caregivers and authority figures to shape our sense of self. Narcissistic parents or siblings, however, can distort this process. A parent’s constant criticism, emotional neglect, or shifting expectations may leave a child questioning their worth and struggling to trust their own perceptions. Similarly, a gaslighting teacher might undermine a child’s confidence in their abilities, leaving a lasting mark on their self-esteem.
When these early wounds go unaddressed, they can create a vulnerability that can be retriggered by narcissistic individuals in the workplace.
The Workplace as a Trigger
Workplaces often mirror family dynamics. Power structures, hierarchies, and interpersonal relationships can unconsciously remind us of past experiences. If you’ve grown up in an environment dominated by a narcissist, encountering a similar personality at work can reopen old wounds. Common scenarios include:
Micromanaging Bosses: A boss who constantly criticizes or undermines your efforts may remind you of a parent who never acknowledged your achievements.
Gaslighting Colleagues: A co-worker who twists facts or denies their actions can evoke the same feelings of confusion and self-doubt instilled by a manipulative sibling or teacher.
Toxic Team Dynamics: Being excluded, scapegoated, or unfairly blamed can feel eerily similar to childhood experiences of favouritism or neglect.
These triggers can cause emotional flashbacks, where you unconsciously react to the present situation with the same fear, shame, or anger you felt as a child.
The Emotional Toll
When unresolved trauma resurfaces, it can manifest in several ways:
- Self-Doubt:You may second-guess your decisions or struggle to assert yourself, fearing rejection or judgment.
- Overcompensation:To avoid criticism, you might overwork or strive for perfection, leading to burnout.
- Avoidance:You may withdraw from opportunities or relationships to protect yourself from potential harm.
- Hypervigilance:Constantly anticipating criticism or conflict can leave you emotionally exhausted.
These patterns not only hinder professional growth but also take a toll on your mental health and overall well-being.
Healing and Moving Forward
The effects of narcissistic trauma can be significant but are healable. Among other therapies, The BLAST Technique® is a highly effective method for addressing PTSD, trauma, and emotions linked to narcissistic experiences, whether from childhood or recent events. By resolving trauma, the nervous system can reset, enabling healing and fostering confidence, strength, and resilience for the future.