Fairness
How fair and effective are formal grievances for the employee when dealing with a toxic boss?
More often than not the outcome of a formal grievance is not what the employee expects i.e. their grievance was not upheld, and they now feel more anxious and stressed after the process.
There is also a feeling of being let down by their employers and not having their experience validated, which can be soul-destroying.
Solid Evidence
Making a formal grievance about a toxic boss who often holds a senior position within the company needs to be planned and backed with solid evidence, along with witnesses.
Whilst in your mind you know the truth of what you experienced, the outcome of a formal grievance is rarely what you would expect it to be.
The grievance process is usually conducted by HR and internal managers who have no experience or understanding of narcissistic behaviour.
With that in mind the company will always try to protect itself in these cases and shut down any potential threat to its business.
Fear of Retaliation
If the company culture is one of toxicity and fear, the managers will be very reluctant to go against the company out of fear of retaliation or losing their job – it is a vicious circle for all employees.
I have worked with so many people over the years who have been scapegoated (blamed and shamed for actions, situations and results they were not responsible for) and gaslit (made to doubt their own reality). Through this type of grievance process, they end up leaving the company at the end of it.
Top Tips for Formal Grievance
Here are some tips to consider before submitting a formal grievance :
- Stick to the facts and do not allow your emotions take over.
- Have plenty of documented evidence, including dates, times, emails, text messages etc.
- Have witnesses who are willing to defend you position. This is one that you need to be careful of. People will be thinking of their own position, so may not defend you when push comes to shove – they will try to protect themselves rather than speak the truth.
- Ask yourself honestly – Do I actually want to work in this company going forward? How will I feel if my grievance is not withheld? Do I need the added stress of engaging in this process? Do I need to consider leaving the business and focusing on my own growth and career progression?
- Get professional advice prior to submitting your grievance.
- If the company culture is toxic and the leadership is weak, that toxicity will not change regardless of the grievance outcome – Do you want to be in this type of environment?
- Prioritise your own mental health.
A formal grievance is a personal choice, with no guarantee of a positive outcome – choose wisely.
Your point of power is focusing on you and how you can create positive change in your life. You cannot change other people, and you most certainly cannot change a company culture single-handedly. Maybe it’s time to consider other options?
I provide a 12-week 1-1 coaching programme designed specifically to help you if you’re in this situation.
No one size fits all, I appreciate everyone is as unique as their situation.
For a free confidential consultation (20 mins) to explore how you can gain your power, DM me or send an email to paula@paulaking.co.uk